Esther Perel suggests that making up for being a bad partner in a relationship involves three key steps: initiating a conversation, actively listening, and taking responsibility for your actions.

In a long-term relationship, priorities can change, and your partner may be pushed to the back seat due to stressors from health, family, or work. They may remain in that position for an extended period.

If you've been absent and want to reignite intimacy with your significant other, it can be uncomfortable to bring up the desire, as it's understandable to feel that way, says renowned psychotherapist Esther Perel.

"Esther Perel's Desire Bundle," a pair of online courses, has been released by the author and podcast host, aimed at rekindling romantic passion.

But the only way to improve the situation is to address it.

"The conversation can be verbal or nonverbal, but you need to initiate it."

To take ownership of your errors and reignite your collaboration, follow these three steps.

1. Own your behavior

To start the conversation, Perel offers the following script:

"I have been absent for an extended period and now I am back, taking full accountability for my actions."

Despite the reason for your depression or caring for a dying family member, I understand that your partner's experience has been less than ideal.

You can say something along the lines of:

"I was occupied for a long time, which caused me to lose sight of my responsibilities and neglect you and us. Now that I'm back, I realize the error of my ways and apologize."

2. Own it again

Taking responsibility three times is a good rule-of-thumb to prevent resentment from building after an apology, according to Perel.

If your responsibility and ownership are not acknowledged, the responsibility of forgiveness will be passed on to the other person, she states.

If your partner continues to reject your apology after the third one, it is their responsibility to determine the reason and decide how to proceed.

3. Ask them to engage

If they agree to work on reinvigorating the relationship, start making some plans.

"According to Perel, if you engage in activities that are enjoyable, familiar, and comfortable, your friendship will likely remain strong. However, if you want to strengthen your romantic relationship, you must take on new challenges, risks, and uncertainties."

Perhaps you could switch up your routine and watch a live show on Friday nights instead of a movie. On Saturday mornings, instead of doing household chores, let the dishes sit for a few hours and go for a bike ride at the park or try out a new restaurant for brunch.

Introducing some variation into your lives can help reignite the spark.

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