A pediatrician recommends this as the best way to instill resilience in children.

A pediatrician recommends this as the best way to instill resilience in children.
A pediatrician recommends this as the best way to instill resilience in children.

The topic of parenting styles is highly debated among parents and researchers alike, with discussions ongoing about the ideal combination of empathy and structure for children to become well-adjusted adults. Should gentle parenting be the preferred approach, or is authoritative parenting more effective? It is important to note that authoritative parenting is not the same as authoritarian parenting.

Lighthouse parenting, a new approach, has been receiving praise from experts for its balance between freedom and rigidity.

This parenting style involves a balance between rules and warmth, falling between the extremes of helicopter and gentle parenting.

Dr. Mona Amin, a pediatrician from Fort Lauderdale, Florida, advises parents to establish limits while providing assistance.

"Lighthouse parenting fosters resilience and autonomy in kids while balancing protection," she says. "This style aligns with my approach to parenting, which involves allowing children to demonstrate their abilities before intervening."

'The very best protection is preparation'

Dr. Ken Ginsburg, a professor of pediatrics at Children's Hospital of Philadelphia, states that some parents restrict their children's experiences in an effort to protect them from emotional or physical harm.

Often called "helicopter parenting," this method can stunt growth.

"Preparation is the key to the best protection, according to Ginsburg. One way to prepare a child for challenges is by allowing them to fall and get back up on their own."

Unlike a helicopter parent, a lighthouse parent lets their children make their own decisions and face the outcomes of their choices.

Ginsburg advises against allowing a three-year-old to touch the stove but permits them to knock over the cookie jar as a way for them to learn how to clean it up.

'I can't imagine that's unproductive for anybody'

Amin states that lighthouse parents recognize their child's emotions and do not criticize them for feeling disappointed. However, they may not spend as much time co-regulating as a gentle parent would.

""Empathy is the focus in gentle parenting, with more collaboration and validation," she states."

In the gentle parenting approach, a grocery store meltdown would require more focus on a child's emotions. You would investigate the root cause of their upset and possibly even physically sit with them to help them relax, Amin advises.

"If the kid is still crying, maybe you don't take the time to sit there."

You're giving your child the freedom to make mistakes and handle difficult situations, while demonstrating your willingness to provide support and advice.

According to Ginsburg, this parenting style would be beneficial for any child: "Knowing that your parent loves, guides, and is always present is unproductive for no child."

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