What I've learned about happiness since moving to Mexico 18 years ago.

As I considered relocating from California to Mexico almost twenty years ago, I pondered whether it was acceptable to make a decision based solely on the belief that it would bring me happiness.

My move to a new location didn't make sense as I didn't know anyone there, couldn't speak the language and would be uncomfortable. Although I could continue my work online, I was leaving my primary job, which provided a stable salary, excellent health insurance, and retirement benefits.

My close friends warned me against this idea, but my kids and heart urged me to proceed.

I came to the realization that my confusion was due to years of being taught how to make decisions, what was expected of us, and what was considered the right thing to do. Personal happiness was not a significant factor in those teachings.

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I made the decision to prioritize my happiness and have not regretted it since. The unforgettable joy I experienced while vacationing in Mazatlán the previous year was too compelling to ignore. I knew I had to do everything in my power to make that experience a regular part of my life.

Having spent 18 years in Mexico and being retired for the past six, I have gained insights on what brings happiness.

Happiness is a mindset

There will be days and times when happiness seems unattainable, such as when I have to undergo a root canal.

By cultivating a foundation of happiness as your default mindset, you'll find it easier to let go of stress over minor details and adopt a more comprehensive outlook.

In Mexico, the "small stuff" is always present. To endure, you must learn to breathe deeply and let go.

The power goes out, your patio floods, and the bank machine eats your card on a Sunday. Despite these setbacks, you must keep going and maintain a positive outlook, knowing that these difficulties will eventually come to an end.

Happiness is a conscious choice

You're the one who decides to be happy, or not.

In Mexican culture, the idea of mañana, or "tomorrow," is often used to convey that something cannot happen today. People use this phrase with a shrug and exaggerated eye roll, implying that it will happen eventually.

It may happen tomorrow, the next day, or even the next week, and it's okay.

One of the most challenging aspects of living in Mexico for our busy American minds is adjusting to its relaxed pace. However, this very aspect also makes it an appealing place to live.

By embracing this mindset, we can find happiness as we learn to let go of stress and worry. With time, we can confidently say "mañana" with a smile, knowing that we have the power to choose happiness even in difficult situations.

Less financial stress allows for more happiness

My expenses here are lower than what I expect to pay for a similar lifestyle in most places north of the border.

My two-bedroom house with a small yard, enclosed courtyard, and rooftop patio costs only 9,000 pesos a month, which is equivalent to $480. My cell phone plan with free international calls costs me about $19 a month. The 5G internet in my house costs around $30 per month. Water is included in my rent, and I get free trash pick-up three times a week. My electric bill averages around $12 a month.

Recently, I was curious about how much I spend on food, so I saved every receipt from my food purchases for a month, including those from big and small grocery stores, the weekly outdoor market, and my local bakery that provides me with bread, croissants, and English muffins.

I can afford the things I need and want on my modest fixed income, which adds up to roughly $320 dollars plus about $40 for wine.

Happiness comes from family and community

Mexican culture places a high value on family and togetherness, which is evident in various scenarios such as multiple generations dining out, lounging at the beach, or celebrating public holidays. Teenagers assist Grandpa in walking through the sand, while pre-teens take turns carrying a sleeping baby during parades. During Christmas and Easter holidays, individuals often take two or more weeks off work to spend time with family and simply enjoy each other's company.

On Mother's Day, I encountered a 10-piece mariachi band performing in front of a local family's house.

One of the matriarch's 20-something granddaughters came over and asked if I was a mother. When I said yes, she hugged me and said, "Congratulations!" Then she invited me to sit with them and enjoy the music and a simple breakfast of bread and hot chocolate.

This kind of warmth has been an education for me, especially when compared to American culture where crying babies are often scowled at, elders are often invisible, and families tend to live and grow apart.

Despite being thousands of miles away, one of my goals this year is to spend more time with my adult children, their spouses, and grandkids. I closely monitor flight prices and have a dependable house- and cat-sitter lined up. I have set aside savings specifically for this purpose.

Video calls enable us to "see" each other during our visits. I can be present for birthdays, Friday night pizza with the grandkids and more.

The more I learn about them and they learn about me, the greater my happiness.

'I've discovered how to perform small actions that bring me happiness.'

I have made happiness a priority in my decision-making process, as I did when I decided to relocate to Mexico.

"Will this make me happy?" is my bottom line.

Engaging in small activities that bring me joy, such as making a perfect espresso, talking to a friend, or indulging in retail therapy, makes me feel good and reminds me of the importance of self-care.

Despite being called "foolish" for making a move two decades ago, I am now living the life I always dreamed of and experiencing a level of consistent happiness I've never known before.

Janet Blaser, a former journalist from California, has been living in Mexico since 2006 and now focuses on expat living. Her first book, "Why We Left: An Anthology of American Women Expats," is an Amazon bestseller. You can follow Janet on Instagram and Facebook.

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