The kind of person we need to feel our best is not promoters who praise us.

In order to lead a fulfilling and intentional life, we may need to reevaluate our social circle. We must consider whether our current network of friends and colleagues is equipped to support us in achieving our objectives, dreams, and objectives.

I'm not referring to assistance in the form of someone in our network introducing us to someone who could potentially provide us with our next job. These connections, although valuable, can easily become transactional.

We need assistance beyond promoters who will sing our praises when we've reached a high point.

We require the assistance of cheerleaders, advisors, and collaborators who are present with us during the challenging process of creating or attempting something new. Their support may manifest in various forms, such as emotional encouragement, innovative ideas, or practical knowledge.

I call them "gems."

'They can serve as role models, mentors, therapists, coaches, and confidants.'

Those who uplift us and make us feel our best are the gems in our lives. They are thoughtful, energetic peers and friends who accept us, acknowledge our talents, and motivate us to pursue our goals. They have faith in our abilities and encourage us when we struggle with self-doubt.

They provide honest feedback when our actions don't align with our values or when we need to improve our skills and talents. They serve as sounding boards, offer guidance, and challenge our thoughts when necessary.

When we're discouraged, they bring levity; when we feel stuck, they provide inspiration and motivation; and when we're too afraid to take our ideas and feelings seriously, they do so for us.

In creative endeavors, they can be role models, mentors, therapists, coaches, and co-conspirators. They don't necessarily need business degrees or a high net worth to be valuable partners in life.

Of the people you spend most time with, who stands out?

Who are the five individuals with whom you spend the majority of your time on a daily basis, either physically or virtually?

What is the number of gems in your top five? Don't worry if it's less than you hoped for. It's not about the quantity of gems but the quality of moments you share with them that truly matters.

Rewritten sentence: Create a separate list for the gems in your life who aren't in your top-five list. Next to each name, write down one or two words that describe what you appreciate about them.

Discovering or reminding yourself of the qualities, traits, and values you admire most is not only a lovely exercise in gratitude but also a way to share those words with those who embody them.

How to surround yourself with the right people

We often find a difference between the people we desire to spend time with and those we actually interact with due to various reasons such as life circumstances, job, and geography.

We may not have as much time for our gems as we'd like due to high demand, but we can control our own availability. It's important to identify any misalignment without blaming ourselves or others.

Reflect on your top five people and gems lists while considering the following.

1. Which person would you like to spend more time with? Add a plus sign next to their names.
2. Perhaps a particular friend brings out the snark or gossip in you.
3. Whose company is just right? Add a checkmark.
4. If you need to reconnect with someone, create a new list of contacts.

Assessing your current position can aid in achieving your goals and staying true to your values.

What is preventing you from spending more time with the people you love and admire the most? How can you strengthen your relationships with them and move them higher on your list of top five?

You don't have to drastically change your social circle or friend group, but being more mindful of who you spend time with and whether they support your cause in various ways, including emotional, creative, and intellectual, is the goal of this exercise.

It's important to make an effort to connect with the people who matter to you, rather than waiting for them to reach out or worrying about coming across as too eager.

Ximena Vengoechea is a multitalented individual who is a user researcher, writer, and illustrator. She is the creator of The Life Audit and has authored several nonfiction books and journals, including the new book "The Life Audit: A Step-By-Step Guide to Discovering Your Goals and Building the Life You Want" and companion "The Life Audit Journal." Her writing has been featured in Inc., The Washington Post, Newsweek, Forbes, and Fast Company, among others. Additionally, she writes Letters from Ximena, a newsletter about staying curious, getting creative, and living well.

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Rewritten: Discovering your goals and building the life you want is a crucial step in achieving success and fulfillment.