How to Support Children's Passions Without Being Overbearing

How to Support Children's Passions Without Being Overbearing
How to Support Children's Passions Without Being Overbearing

It's crucial for parents to differentiate between healthy motivation and pressure to succeed when a child shows interest in something.

It's a positive sign when a child shows an interest in and aptitude for something, whether it's academics, sports, or creative hobbies. However, parents often fall into the trap of pushing their kids to seek achievement rather than simply letting them enjoy their interests.

This type of "pushy" parenting, centered on achievement, can negatively impact a child's well-being in the future.

Research conducted at Arizona State University in 2016 revealed that the pressure parents exert on their children regarding their grades and extracurricular activities could negatively impact their ability to lead fulfilling lives in the future.

Contrary to popular belief, children of parents who prioritize achievement over qualities like compassion and decency may have lower grades, according to a study.

Suniya Luthar, one of the study's authors, stated that overemphasizing external validation, such as grades and extra-curricular honors, for children's self-worth can increase their insecurity, anxiety, and overall distress.

Professor Ellie Lee of the University of Kent stated on a phone call with CNBC that parents often believe they must mold their child into a specific person, but much of it is beyond their control.

Follow your own interests

To motivate children to pursue their passions without pressure, parents should have their own interests, according to Lee, director of the Centre for Parenting Culture Studies.

People can almost "drop their former self" and stop pursuing their interests when they become parents, as she said.

While having children can significantly alter one's life, it is crucial for parents to maintain their own interests.

According to her, the thing most likely to influence children and spark their interest is seeing people genuinely passionate about what they do.

According to Lee, children may appreciate the dedication required to master a skill if they observe their parents investing time and effort into something they enjoy.

Listen and observe

Melernie Meheux, a senior child and adolescent educational psychologist, advised CNBC in a phone call that parents should pay attention to and monitor their children's interests by observing and listening to them.

Meheux, an academic tutor at the University College London Institute of Education, stated that she would consistently provide constructive feedback to motivate and inspire, while focusing on acknowledging their strengths and avoiding harsh criticism.

She advised parents to allow children to discover their interests by engaging in play or experimenting with various activities.

Meheux stated that allowing children to discover their own interests and providing them with kind encouragement is beneficial for their mental health and emotional regulation.

"Encouraging children to engage in activities they enjoy can lead to greater learning, outweighing the benefits of forcing them to do things they're not skilled at," she stated.

Meheux acknowledged that while many parents have good intentions for their kids, they may sometimes be "misguided" in their efforts to encourage kids to pursue a certain hobby.

Check out: Why manners matter: Top tips for raising kind kids

by Vicky McKeever

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