Over 40% of student loan borrowers conceal their debt from their partners.

Over 40% of student loan borrowers conceal their debt from their partners.
Over 40% of student loan borrowers conceal their debt from their partners.
  • A recent report indicates that approximately 19% of student loan borrowers in the U.S. conceal their debt balance from their partners.
  • Student debt can cause shame, guilt, depression, and anxiety, leading people to keep secrets, according to therapists.
  • It is advised to reveal the truth promptly to ease your conscience, safeguard your loved one from financial harm, and enhance your relationship.

Despite the fact that many college graduates are grappling with student loan debt, many borrowers are not discussing their loans with their significant other.

A recent report from the personal finance site and The Harris Poll reveals that nearly 1 in 5 student loan borrowers in the U.S. (19%) conceal their loan balance from their partner. The survey was conducted on 2,098 adults in early May.

The topic of student debt can cause borrowers to conceal their loans due to shame, guilt, depression, and anxiety. However, therapists advise borrowers to reveal the truth as soon as possible to relieve their conscience, safeguard their loved ones from financial risks, and enhance their relationships.

"Graduates experience complex emotions when celebrating their success while silently worrying over their loans, as our society collectively acknowledges the price tag and benefits of higher education and considers having debt shameful, according to Traci Williams, a clinical psychologist and certified financial therapist in East Point, Georgia."

The national education debt in the U.S. is approximately $1.6 trillion, surpassing credit card and auto debt burdens on Americans.

The average loan balance at graduation is around $30,000.

Student debt and power imbalances

Clay Cockrell, a licensed clinical social worker based in New York, stated that most individuals were never taught how to discuss money. He added that if your significant other does not have outstanding student debt, the topic can feel especially taboo.

Cockrell stated that the discussion now centers on the wealth disparity between someone who inherited their education and someone who relied on loans to finance it.

1. Buying a home in these areas is the least challenging. 2. 401(k) plan savings rates are currently at record highs. 3. Financial issues are often avoided by couples.

Despite the embarrassment that often comes with debt, being truthful with your partner is crucial for a healthy romantic relationship, therapists advise.

If you conceal your debt or financial history from your partner, you are being dishonest and putting them at risk, according to Cockrell.

Buying a house, starting a family, and saving for the future can be more challenging due to student debt, according to research.

How to talk about student debt with your partner

To confess your debt to your partner, start by being gentle with yourself, advised NerdWallet loans expert Kate Wood.

"Wood stated that it was not you engaging in an unwise spending spree with a credit card, but rather funding your education. He emphasized that by managing the debt and being transparent about it, you are taking ownership. This does not indicate any warning signs."

If you're in a supportive relationship, your partner will prioritize helping you rather than criticizing you.

"Wood advised that if you're primarily concerned about feeling embarrassed or making a mistake, it's important to remember that this is someone you love and trust. You shouldn't feel the need to hide from them."

Williams advised that when you're ready to discuss your loans, it's important to choose a peaceful, quiet location where both parties can concentrate.

Therapists suggest that when sharing your debt with your partner, it's important to apologize and use "I" statements, such as "I felt" or "I thought," rather than blaming them. It's also important to be honest about why you've kept the details of your debt a secret and how you've been worried about their reaction to the news.

Before disclosing the truth, it's advisable to have a plan for paying off student debt ready, as therapists suggest.

Williams advised that when sharing sensitive information, such as secret debts, it's important to remember that your partner cares about you and is likely to want to support you.

In unhealthy relationships, people may withhold information to protect themselves, Wood stated. There are resources available for those experiencing any form of abuse, including financial mistreatment, such as the anonymous National Domestic Violence Hotline.

by Genna Contino

Investing